October 12, 2012

Third Time

Is, apparently, really the charm.

I'm sure you've been wondering all week.
Just dying for an update on the fingerprint saga.
Because what else could you possibly have on your mind?
Other than worrying about my life?

I, once again, put it off for a bit.
I'm phenomenal at doing that.
But I had great reasons.

Monday, Ryan was off.
With the kiddos in school all day now,
we had a whole day to ourselves.
It was lovely.
I couldn't ruin that day with fingerprint taking.

Tuesday, no idea why I didn't go in.
I can't remember why.
I'm sure I was busy doing something important.
The kids were out of clean undies or something.

Wednesday morning,
I decided to follow Mr. Master Controller's directions.
I called.

Mr. MC: Detention Center.
Me: When would be a good time
       to come in to get my fingerprints done?
Mr. MC: Well...hmm...
              (big suck in of air
              and mumbling of something incoherent)
              If you could come in the next 20 minutes
              we could probably get you in.
              Otherwise the rest of the day is pretty hit and miss.
Me: I can be there in 10 minutes.
Mr. MC (actually sounding somewhat pleasant): Ok. Come on in.

Knowing I'm not looking near as put together today,
I ran to my bedroom to at least change out of my slippers,
threw my hair in to a pony
and off I went.
Naturally, I got caught by a train.
Fortunately, it wasn't one of those pokey ones.
Thank you, Mr. Engineer.

After a short wait,
a female officer takes me back.
Into the jail, I guess.
There's a whole lot of metal doors.
That are kind of that mint green/gray color.
And lots of glass windows.
And men walking around in orange jump suits.
(Could have warned me about that one, Beth.)
I tried to avoid making eye contact.
And pretended like they weren't staring.

I'm so silly.
I was thinking I'd come out with black ink on my fingers.
Ummm, Gina.
You do know you're living in the 21st century, right?
It's a little thing called technology.
That, turns out, really isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Considering the system didn't like me.
And they had to scan ALL of my fingers 3 times.
As the guys in the orange jumpsuits continued to stare.

Then, to top it off,
I had to pay $15 dollars for this service.
Should have known...

In honor of all the fun I've had,
I took a mugshot of myself.
Now I am a pro at this detention center stuff.
But here's to hoping I never have to draw on my expertise again.


Melissa Flaming said...

What?!?! Newton is ahead of New Mexico in technology?? Mine was the ol' "press your fingers on the black ink pad, roll them carefully, not forcefully, across each little box, then go wash your hands with Orange Go-Jo in the bathroom" kind of fingerints. Newton, I'm impressed. Not only that, but $15 for a techy-type fingerprint vs. $40 for the old-fashioned kind?? New Mexico sure is screwed up!
BUT....I sure am glad you finally accomplished your goal. AND got outta there safely. Nice mug shot!

Anonymous said...

Oh, yeah, forgot about the prisoners. Sorry! That was a little freaky, as well as being back there in that room with all the metal doors. But, I didn't get to use the scanning fingerprinting, that's cool. But they also didn't charge me. That sucks!!! Glad you got it done and will be happily subbing before we know it!!! How do you feel about painting with Kindergarten?